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The Holiday Weekend - Part One

By BJChips(5,633) BJChips

Dear Diary,

Well, here it is, the last long holiday of the summer. The hot days are gone now and the cooler days and nights make for better sleeping. 

With the temperatures only in the seventies during the day I get to take the humans on more car rides. High summer temperatures limit the number of car trips I take them on, as we all know hot cars and human pets don’t mix!
Well dear diary this is my last chance to relax and do stuff like a dog. October is a very busy month for me with five different dog shows to attend. Once they start, dirt, rolling in the leaves and twigs and crawling around in the back yard are strictly off limits. However, this weekend everything goes. I’m doing all sorts of guy stuff with my male human pet.
It started yesterday morning with a trip to the local hardware store where we purchased several items for the yard and house. My role in these activities is strictly supervision. Always supervise your human pets when they are engaged in activities such as climbing ladders, cleaning gutters and straightening out the garage! You can’t be too careful as they tend to get into all sorts of trouble and left to their own devices they can actually end up filthy dirty with scraps and all sorts of other injuries!
We started with the garage. This is a place where all the “junk” that the human’s feel is to good to throw out but never used is kept. WOW! There’s stuff in there from before I was a gleam in my daddy’s eye (if you know what I mean).

Twice a year my human pets attempt to clear away space. I really don’t understand this because all it results in is hauling all of the stuff out, looking at it for a few minutes and putting it all back. Oh well, it keeps them entertained for the better part of the morning and affords me the opportunity to snoop through stuff I wouldn’t ordinarily get to look at.
Many things draw my attention. The first of which is the ever-growing assortment of large plastic creatures that are placed on the front lawn at various holidays. My female pet has collected about fifteen of these gigantic blow up creatures. There’s Frankenstein and a large ghost for Halloween. A stuffed turkey and a pair of something called Pilgrims for Thanksgiving. Then, and here in lays the bulk of these things, there are all the Christmas creatures. Let’s see, I found Santa Claus and all of his Reindeer, Frosty the snowman and a whole family of snow people. Of course, lets not forget the giant candy canes and polar bears and of course, the three blow up packages that some how always look like they’ve been rewrapped from last year.  Ah, humans … every holiday we get another such item!
The process of putting these things together always frustrates my male human. He growls and humph around complaining about missing parts and “why didn’t this get put away in the same carton!”  Hee hee hee, silly human!
The garage project took the better part of yesterday morning, everything out, inspected and returned. I sniffed at everything and found nothing of interest so I perched on an old lawn chair and supervised the removal and return of these items. The cat, still sore from his defeat at Bed Hill has stayed away but was caught peeking out of the window at us.
We stop for lunch and since the day is warm and sunny eat sandwiches at the “old” patio table, which has been stored in the garage for a number of years as if waiting for the “new” patio table to run off.
After lunch, it’s more guy stuff with my male human. The tall ladder comes out and it’s time to clean the front gutters and inspect the light strip that will hold all those twinkle light strings at holiday time.
My male human climbs the ladder with ease and begins to pull all the debris from the gutters. For a while, I supervise from the ground level but decide that I too can climb this ladder and get onto the roof as well.
So up I go, rung after rung after rung I climb into the sheer heights of clear sky. After climbing for several moments, I arrive at the edge of the roof where my male human sits working on this light strip. He seems shocked that I have joined him but helps me onto the roof, I sit and supervise the repair of the strip, and it’s return to the eaves. We work our way down the roofline cleaning and checking as we go. All is well until the female human discovers that I am on the roof! She is very displeased and shouts “Get him down from there before he falls off and kills himself!”
Silly girl, I’ve got four feet to grip the roof with, her mate the male has only two! “He’s fine! Let him be a dog!” the male shouts back down.

”You get him down from there right now! He’s going to fall!” she shouts back.
Well, dear diary there was no more peace to be had. She stood there shouting at him and at me until I surrendered and allowed her to come up the ladder and retrieve me from the roof. I could just see the cat laughing about my untimely removal from such a task. “You’re such a wus dog!” he would be saying.
The disagreement about me on the roof ended all activity for the day. The male human retreated to the den for afternoon football and the female set about cleaning drawers in the kitchen. The cat returned to his cozy, nay he dared not make a run at the bed!
I joined the male human and watched football, if I can’t be on the roof doing guy stuff at least I can growl and grunt at the grid ironers while chewing on a stinky athletic sock! 
The weekend continues and so does this story, until next time dear diary

This Blog Post has been read 13 times.
Posted to ProBlogs.com on Monday, January 01, 2007
View other posts by BJChips

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