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Posted Wednesday, December 12, 2007
View All Blog Posts submitted by Danny Davids

The story you are about to read is true.  The names have been changed to protect the guilty, although they certainly don't deserve to be protected.

 

About two months ago I started getting phone calls on my work cell from people I didn't know.  Because it's a work cell, I don't bother answering those calls where I don't recognize the caller.  As a result, I started getting voice mails from several people who were looking for "Andy", somebody who definitely was not me. 

 

I ignored the calls and deleted the voice mails, thinking that the callers would realize they were calling the wrong person and stop calling.  Wrong.  The calls continued, coming through at all hours of the day and night (one of the hazards of working in IT is you usually have to be available 24-7).  In addition, I began receiving text messages from these individuals wanting "Andy" to call them back.  Again, I ignored the text messages, deleting them in the hopes that somebody would get a clue.  Silly me.

 

Finally, after waking up to answer my work phone at 2 am only to receive yet another text message from "Mark", I decided to (politely) respond.  I explained that this was not "Andy" and that "Mark" had been repeatedly dialing the wrong number.  I received a rather sheepish apology in reply.  I went back to bed, confident that my problem phone call issue was over.  Silly me.

 

Later that day I re-recorded my cell phone's answering message, including my name and the name of my company.  There was no way that somebody calling my number and listening to my message could not understand that they were dialing a wrong number.  I had forgotten all about the dogged determination of human beings to be right, even in the face of insurmountable evidence to the contrary.  Even after making these changes, I continued receiving the phone calls and voice mails.  (I'm guessing "Mark" never bothered to let anybody else in the group know that I wasn't "Andy".)

 

Finally today I'd had it.  I have been in class all week and right smack dab in the middle of a computer lab, my phone went off.  It was a text message, and upon seeing the number and reading the message I immediately knew who was sending it.  (Nothing vulgar or suggestive, but I don't have any business contacts calling me "sugar".)  Enough was definitely enough.  I responded with a text message (still being Mr. Nice Guy because this IS a business line, after all) letting the individual know that she (I'm guessing at the gender because of the word "sugar") was dialing a business number, and not "Andy's".  After reading her response, I rethought my guess of her gender, because most ladies I know don't use words like that.  I explained (again nicely) that for the past two months three different people had been calling this business number and couldn't understand why "Andy" could not be reached.  The response?  Yep...I was told to fornicate with myself.  (Absolutely, positively NOT a lady!!)

 

My options at this point are to request a new phone number from my company (which is a hassle for them, my work associates, and me), or continue to receive these calls and messages and ignore them, even if they come during the middle of the night.  I can tell you without asking which option I will be allowed to use.

 

The point of my story is this:  We live in a very high-tech world.  There are all kinds of innovative gadgets out there that are designed to help us live our lives better, easier, and more conveniently.  But all the technology in the universe doesn't do any good when you have an individual who doesn't want to learn how to use the technology properly.  "I shouldn't have to think.  That's what my computer is for!"  Or the cell phone.  Or the ignition system in the car.  Or the card-reader system at the office.  Or the billing systems that their creditors use to make money off them every month.  Or the payroll system their employers use to pay them and give them their benefits each pay period.  Fear and laziness can make even the smartest people look awfully unintelligent (and let's not talk about what it does to those who are less than smart!).

 

Somebody once told me the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over, hoping for a different result.  I'd say dialing the same phone number repeatedly in the hopes of getting a different person qualifies.  It's like the Comcast commercial where the guy with the full-body tattoo calls the tattoo artist from his new digital phone, expecting that this time he'll be able to get the tattoo removed.  The tattoo artist replies, "Sorry, Roger.  You tiger now."  The commercial cracks me up, but when people actually take this attitude in real life, it's not quite as funny.

 

Yeah, I know.  You're probably thinking, "What happened to Mr. Nice Guy?  Aren't you worried that you might upset somebody with your comments?"  Frankly, anybody who would be offended by what I just wrote most likely hasn't figured out how to turn on their brain, much less their computer.  Even the much-lauded Mac isn't great enough to teach people how to do that.