Why do men and women cheat?

Firstly I must make it clear that I have never cheated or had an affair with a married man etc. and so this blog is written purely from what I know of those who have cheated and had affairs.

From those I know who have cheated, the reasons for men cheating seems to differ vastly from those of why women cheat, though of course there will be exceptions to every rule.

Women mainly seem to cheat when things are not right in their own relationship and by that I don’t mean sexually I mean with things such as a decline in how much attention, affection, love, respect and appreciation they receive. These are things that fuel a woman’s engine in terms of devotion and loyalty and the more loved and appreciated a woman feels the happier and more faithful she is likely to remain. But if these things are lacking then her eye may stray to another man who can offer her these things. Or at least make the promise of them. As in terms of a full time relationship, the things that seem to make affairs spectacular usually wither and die. But that’s a whole other blog!

So why don’t women just leave their husbands if they aren’t getting the attention they desire? Well women are eternal optimists, we can spend years hoping that at some point things will change, the man will change and everything will be alright again. They may still love their husbands but need that gap to be filled. Freudian slip not intended! Then there are practical considerations, breaking up the family, losing their home, their lifestyle etc. The women cheaters may even hope that the affair is discovered so that their partner will get that shock to the system they need to make more effort on their relationship.

Women tend to be less cautious I have noticed when they have affairs than men. They may not delete text messages, dispose of love notes and may even bring their partner to their own home for lovemaking! A subconscious desire to be caught perhaps? Have the decision to make or break up their relationship made for them - who knows.

With regards to men, it can be the case that it is for reasons similar to those stated above for women but the chaps I know who’ve cheated on their partners have done it purely as a sexual thing and without any absence of love or respect for their real partners. They will declare they love them, cherish them, and want to marry them. Yet despite all this they still stray. Why? A higher sexual drive than the love of their life perhaps or different sexual tastes or a libido that can’t say no when they have sex offered to them on a plate.

This is why when men get caught they will usually beg for forgiveness and declare their love for their partner, whereas women cheaters may just blame their partners and beg for change.

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